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Got any cartoons or pics to help illustrate the great job our nice police are doing?
CRAP ARREST OF THE WEEK
For being pregnant! A woman from Faslane Peace Camp in Scotland spent two and a half hours in a cell after refusing to stand up during court proceedings. The women had asked the judge if she could be excused from standing as she was five months pregnant and suffering from severe backpain. The Judge told her to stand up or get out, before having her removed for contempt of court.
CRAP ARREST OF THE WEEK
For Videoing: A Glasgow resident was arrested for “taking unrequested photographs” of a truck dumping a skip containing some very smelly waste on an unlicensed site. After the skip load was emptied 5 children fell ill with gastro-enteritis, one being hospitalised. Any chance of an arrest for GBH there? The skip is owned by Mr Combe, who has a waste disposal contract with the local Council. SchNEWS asks readers not to phone Mr Combe (0141-7712187) about his business from remote country phone boxes that get left off the hook. But please do phone 01436-820901 for further details and a planned big action.
CRAP ARREST OF THE WEEK
For Wearing a Football Shirt. Back in 1996 on a warm July day in Derry, Liam Forbes was walking along when he removed his jacket to reveal a Celtic football top. Gangs of rowdy Orangemen hurled abuse at him resulting in the arrest of ... Liam for disorderly behaviour! He subsequently sued the RUC for wrongful arrest and last week received over £2000 in compensation.
CRAP OF THE WEEK
April is National Spring Clean Month with the Tidy Britain Group targeting those nasty people who leave fast food restaurants and discard coke cans, McDonald wrappers, chewing gum and such like. The Tidy Group say “people who purchase these products and drop litter are the problem, these are the people we are trying to educate... we can spread the anti-littering message to the actual source.”
We would be the last people who would rubbish their campaign, yet, who are sponsoring the month? Well, McDonald, Coca-Cola and Wrigleys,... erm!. So there you have it: McDonalds are smothering the world in fast poo outlets, wrapping it up in old rubbish and then blaming the customer for making a mess. Sounds McFishy to us.
CRAP ARREST OF THE WEEK
For painting a bus pink! 10 members of the Lesbian Avengers were nicked for hijacking a Stagecoach bus and painting it pink. Stagecoach were targetted because of the Chairman’s funding of the Keep Clause 28 campaign.
CRAP ARREST OF THE WEEK
For having dirty sheets! A couple had their house searched by Manchester cops and were locked in police cells for seven hours (while their three young kids were left unsupervised at home) for the alleged theft of a bed sheet from a Road Chef hotel. They had put the sheet in a laundry bag and left it outside for collection after one of her children had spilled a drink on it. The next day hotel staff found the missing sheet.
CRAP ARREST OF THE WEEK
For waiting for a train! Brighton’s finest were out in force last Saturday night at Brighton station with the usual collection of S&M gear, dogs and vehicles needed to ensure safety for the travelling public. One particularly jovial officer approached a humble SchNEWS scribe and proceeded to let his dog jump all over him, justifying the assault as “just training, sir” before moving on to his next victim. The fifth or sixth person unwillingly drawn into this “training” exercise wasn’t so lucky, as the dog got very excited and the extremely bemused commuter was grabbed by four cops and dragged off to a police car without search, charge or caution.
CRAP ARREST OF THE WEEK
For smiling! At the last Shamrock monkey farm demo a lost-it cop was pointing people out for the snatch squads. One bloke wound him up by standing around doing nothing more sinister and life-threatening than grinning. Not for long - “Grab him!” At the same demo someone was jumped by the goons (not the funny ones) and thrown to the ground, resulting in a shattered hip. He’s still waiting to see if he’ll need a hip replacement.
CRAP ARREST OF THE WEEK
DJ GETS KNICKERED A Brighton DJ, who wishes to remain anonymous, was arrested this week for being in possession of a pair of stolen Y Fronts. He rang SchNews and panted “How can I afford underwear on DJ’s wages?“ He is now looking for a brief to cover his case.
CRAP ARREST OF THE WEEK
For proclaiming the end of the world! This gag didn’t go down to well with everyone on New Years Eve at the Golden Gate of Jerusalem. In absence of any doomsday prophets, our man decided to act the part before the eagerly expectant media circus "And when the seven seals are broken open on the day of judgement, and the seven angels blow their trumpets - when the third angel blows her bugle...." (this rant lifted directly from the film Naked - film buffs take note). They say that in comedy timing is everything. Lead balloons go down faster at certain times, and in certain climates. The holy city is one such climate. The international journalists were all besides themselves with joy; the Israeli police less so.
The bendy man was released without charge, but the police did ask why he had a dress, holy bible, half a bottle of vodka and some necro cards in his bag. These cards are similar to kidney donor cards except they say ‘I support sexual liberation . I want to help others experiment sexually after my death. I request that after my death: A) My body be used for any type of secual activity B) gay only C) straight only D) I do not wish my body to be dismembered or disfigured during necrophiliac sex (you get the picture).
CRAP ARREST OF THE WEEK
For hiding from the rain! A resident of Faslane Peace camp was shopping for candles in Glasgow City Centre last week, when it suddenly started to pour down with rain. Diving for cover in the nearest shop doorway to shelter and roll a cigarette, she was immediately arrested for Breach of the Peace and kept for six hours in a cell. Well that's one way of keeping dry.
For preventing kids being run over! Derek Potter was arrested after building his own zebra crossing outside his cafe in Swansea. Derek sent a petition to the local council after his six year old daughter suffered a broken leg after being hit by a car. The Council replied that they had 50 requests for crossings but could only afford to build one this year (does that mean it would take half a century to build them all?) So Derek went out one evening, installed battery operated beacons and railings and began painting the zebra crossing himself, before being nicked by the cops. "I had to do it in the middle of the night when there was little traffic around," said Derek. "The playground is just over the road and children are always risking their lives to get there."
For juggling! Someone was nabbed by the taste police at the WTO protest in London on Nov. 30th for ‘going equipped to cause wilful criminal damage’. And not even for trying to single-handedly bring down international capital. No, for twirling fire chains. His clothes were seized, his house searched, and then he was released until the cops can prove he’d set light to one of their vans.
CRAP ARREST OF THE WEEK
For spreading peace and love. Two girls in Canterbury who’d cheered up locals for ages by chalking ‘fluffy’ directives around town urging folks to ‘choose love’, ‘just be’ and ‘listen to the colour of your dreams’ found themselves being forced to ‘choose law’ by the unamused, spiky hands of the local Plods who, as always, find it easy to ‘just be’ misanthropic, humourless tossers. Backing the cops up were the local McDonalds, who supplied brushes and water so the girls could be forced to scrub off their positive vibes. To add insult to injury, local rag ‘The Kent Messenger’ printed up mug shots of the girls three days after the event with the caption ‘Have You Seen These Men?"...
For going home: Michele Naa-Obed was arrested at the Jonah House Community in Baltimore in June for "leaving the district of Minnesota without permission and associating with felons"and given the maximum 12 months prison sentence. You see Michele had recently spent 18 months in gaol after disarming a fast-attack submarine and part of her parole was that she couldn’t return to the house where she lived! While awaiting trial for the new heinous crime of living back home, Michele refused bail conditions which said she should avoid public protest, public speaking, live at a residence approved by the court and associate only with law-abiding persons!
As the Virginia Pilot magazine points out "It’s amazing how we become more like the countries we criticise, and worse yet, put sanctions on, because of their abuse of human rights."
Ok, we come clean we made the last one up.
For dishing out free food! People from Food Not Bombs keep getting arrested for handing out free food and drink to the low-income and homeless. 2 were nicked for giving out bagels and juice at UN Plaza in San Francisco. At least 50 heavily armed cops arrived as they tucked in and violently arrested many munchers, confiscating the remaining food. Since the US Dept. of Agriculture reckon that nearly 25 million Americans are so poor they don't get enough food, it's crazy that Food Not Bombs have had over 1000 arrests for sharing hundreds of thousands of veggie meals since 1988. SF Food Not Bombs, P.O. Box 40485 San Francisco, CA 94140 USA http://www.foodnotbombs.org/
For chalking on the pavement
Jaggi Singh was nicked during a demonstration in support of jailed black revolutionary Mumia Abu-Jamal in Toronto, Canada and apparently charged with trespassing!
For tossing a flower onto the grass . Again during a Mumia demo, this time in Portland, Oregon. The man was nicked and fined $999 for offensive littering. When his friend asked why he was being arrested he was thrown to the ground breaking his arm and hauled away in handcuffs; when a woman tried to intervene she was first pushed into the road narrowly missing a bus and car -then arrested.
For using a megaphone . Same town, same demo, the man was arrested for ‘sound violation.
The more conspiratorial amongst you might well ask how 23 police vehicles managed to arrive in a quiet backstreet in Holborn within a minute of an ‘Emergency Back-up’ call being made? Did the police know that the Anarchist Bookfair had taken place just down the road and those very same people might be at Veggies party? Why did a police van from the City of London Police attend an incident in (non-City) Holborn. Were they hoping to find people from June 18th? Or was it due to an hysterical copper who ran off screaming into his personal radio ‘there’s hundreds of them’ and asking for assistance, causing a near riot. If you witnessed any arrests, have lost property etc. ring Veggies 0115 958 5666